Praise and condemning

“It is sheer folly to praise or to condemn your children. Praising builds egos into conflict; so does condemning them. Never think for one moment that condemning diminishes pride one bit, for it does just the opposite, swelling a child’s pride through his secret resentment and judgment.

Once corrupted by praise, children often become addicts. Because praise actually seduces, corrupts and weakens children, they develop a lower and lower sense of self-worth. Addicted to praise, they will literally sell their minds and souls for it. Praise, like all its cousins (music, drugs, alcohol, etc.), actually lowers their worth under the pretext of raising the spirit, because of what they must lower themselves to do to obtain it (praise).

Alas, on either end there are agonies of swollen pride. The cruelty of degradation then could drive them back to the cruelty of praise, until one day they become afraid of making changes and get stuck in a rut as permanent victims of praise or condemnation. The pain could make them want to shoot themselves and all those who are involved in love/hate games of praise and condemnation.

So, acknowledge good performance, but never praise it. Acknowledge bad performance, but don’t condemn it. There must never be condemning or condoning in your words—no emotion or exaggeration of pleasure or of displeasure. If your child draws a good picture and shows it to you for comment, appraise it honestly without emotion. Give your honest opinion. Is it quite good? Then say so calmly. Don’t pump up the child’s ego by emotion-charged exclamations of "Magnificent!" and "Wow, you are going to be a great artist!" (You could get them hung up on an artist’s trip when they have no talent.) If the work could stand improvement, then you might do well to ask your child if he welcomes constructive criticism. Chances are, you will receive the go-ahead and then gentle criticism will be welcomed and taken under serious consideration.

It’s all in your attitude. Love knows that fine line of difference between acknowledgment and praise, between correcting and condemning. Because love knows the difference, love begets a child of love, free from the conditionings of the world.” 

– Proper Discipline by Roy Masters

A Force called Love - resentment

“You don’t have to go to school to be mature, to recognize the difference between the touch of violence and the touch of love. Grab someone with violence and you immediately reinforce the evil within them, while you yourself are in danger of being injected by their evil and their violence. But grab hold of someone because you care enough to be physical with them, and you introduce something new: the salvation of love. Your love-force gets inside and goes to war with the bad spirit; soon the battle is won and they feel better, even grateful. 

But when you "correct" your children with resentment, then resentment only reinforces what is wrong in the child. The wrong—your wrong—gets in, but correction stays out. The same kind of thing often occurs with students. They may be eager to learn at first, but an impatient teacher can easily ruin all of that. The student reacts defensively to the hostility of the teacher, which keeps knowledge out and lets errant behavior in. 

The "authority" in most cases is responsible for making kids worse while apparently trying to make them better. If power and authority were your secret motive, you would never be out of work, simply because you would be creating problems to solve by means of the very process of "solving" them.

So it is very important to be patient when attempting to correct other people. You must be forceful enough to drive the point home, but without resentment. The force I speak of is love, a deep, abiding caring, backed by the absolute certainty of the good you are doing and the knowledge of what is right. Remember, you can’t be like that when you are upset and angry too! Meditate on this fact before you go to war with the error in others.

Let the Truth, firmly spoken, do its work. You must not put effort or energy behind it. You

 will know that you are doing it right when you don’t have frustration and don’t feel guilty afterward. 

When you stand as a loving correction, a different energy is engaged. Love gets through the old defenses. It has the effect of awakening your child to see that you are right in what you say and in what you are. It speaks love instead of hate, so he can accept that correction of love.

The problem in this world lies with wrong authority. People are hurt by all kinds of wrong authorities. However, it is good for them to recognize and respond to a good authority because it reverses the effect of responding to the bad one. 

I remember people giving me good advice which I never took in my early years. Looking back, I realize that if those people who gave those words of advice had spoken with love, it would have jolted me to realize what I needed to realize then. I would not have made so many errors.” 
 - Roy Masters - Proper Discipline

Clearing the mind

A wise old Indian chief once told his braves that inside him he had two wolves fighting for supremacy -- one called love and the other hate. When asked which one was winning, he answered: "The one I feed."

(....., please LISTEN VERY CAREFULLY.

You/x, have been lost in the human-brain-thinking of Mr/Miss/Mrs.x ALL this life. You THINK that is you [your own voice in your head - the one that gives you worries, etc.]. THAT is not you. But it does have control over you/x. You NEED to start "seeing" this [spiritually] for yourself.

 Go find a quiet place [your bedroom, a closet, the bathroom, the attic, the garage, the basement, your car {if you have one} - point being a place where you will not be disturbed, where you can be alone] and sit in a straight back chair [if possible - so you don't let your body go to sleep].

Close your physical eyes.., and AS THOUGH you were sitting in the back of your skull [or AS THOUGH you are sitting in the back of a movie theater].., WATCH the "screen of your 'mind' " [where "thought" arises - INSIDE the middle of your body's forehead]. Practice this. Be patient. Wait. Watch the JUNK going on in there.

You will "see" worry. You will "see" fantasies [of all sorts, not just sexual but even "imagined conversations" of what you might say if you see so and so, or what you should have said when you saw so and so - you will see "images" - you will "hear" songs off the radio {CD's or whatever} - you may hear/see old TV commercials go through - JUNK, meaningless JUNK.


Just keep watching it WHILST putting some distance between you and that JUNK going round in your "head". With a little practice you will soon learn to ignore it and THROUGH observing it [like shining a light on it].., it will just disappear into the ether/lose its power. Your "mind" will clear and almost certainly will "fill again" with more JUNK. Just keep observing. DO NOT get pulled into your "thoughts". They are very powerful but when you humbly, sincerely ask Father for help in Jesus name and you will suddenly realize you are back out of your insane, meaningless thought stream and your "mind" will clear. As this happens.., sit very still and wait.

Your ego-self is VERY arrogant as are the spirits/"powers of darkness" and they "hide" in your SUB-conscious. Until now.., "it" has not had to "come out of hiding". BUT.., "it" will because "it" WANTS you "lost" in "its" THINKING. "It" WILL come up out of your SUBconscious to "fill the void" [of your QUIETED mind] and "it" may give you "images" and "voices" to try and terrify you. THAT is what you've been harboring and abetting. "Be still and KNOW I am God." NOT THINK you know He is God.

Sit patiently. When these "things arise" [and they will].., DO NOT "run". The phone may ring. Your mom may call you to supper. "Things you HAVE to get done" will "pop into mind". "It" will do anything to run you off if "it" can't scare you off.

Practice clearing your mind as often as you can so you can do it without THINKING about it. THAT process is the BEGINNING of SLOWLY opening your spiritual eyes/awakening. Remember.., DO NOT FEAR. DO NOT RUN. Wait. You will see.., "it" CANNOT harm you. "FACE" what you've allowed to "build a home in you". "It" is disgusting. "It" is capable of all manner of evil. "It" is SELFISH, PRIDEFUL, ARROGANT and UGLY. FACE IT. SEE IT. And when you are "shown".., BE THANKFUL for being shown and thank Our Father and His Son for giving you the chance to repent. In the "stillness".., let Father and Jesus KNOW you are TRULY sorry and want THEIR change to come over/into/up through you.

DO this. It is VERY important. †††Now you've been told. You've been warned. Understand.., FEW are willing to face the evil they have become a part of. MOST run like a bolt of lightning hit them. The "path" you THINK you have chosen is NOT for "little sisters". If you can get through what you must.., you will learn to be still and LISTEN. Talk with Father. Ask what you can DO for Him. If you are TRULY sincere.., then maybe Father/Son will take you further. I don't know. That is between you and Them.

 Also.., be warned.., this is no intellectual, ego game. IF you are TRULY sincere you will start getting much better. If not.., you will be further "entranced" in your brain thinking and get MUCH worse. )




Please read The Way home or face The Fire

http://thewayhomeorfacethefire.net

Please also read "The Divine in me"

http://jahtruth.net/noti.htm

How to use The Force [Love]

Written by Tom Von Deck

http://www.elephantjournal.com/2014/03/smite-your-enemies-with-mindfulness-tom-von-deck/

People who develop mindfulness are pretty tough to mess with.

"Maybe you’ve discovered this before, after messing with the wrong person one time and learning a painful and heart opening lesson. Maybe it was the other way around.

Mindfulness is a powerful force that can be used for what many in metaphysical circles call “psychic self-defense.” It can be likened to a martial art that can transform any conflict or uncomfortable social situation into a catalyst for deep healing. It can also protect us from any harm a person can inflict if used properly.

First let me explain, in case some readers don’t know, what mindfulness is. Mindfulness is the art of being present with moment to moment experience as it arises into consciousness. This includes both pleasant and unpleasant emotions, thoughts, sensations and anything else that can be experienced.

When we’re not mindful, our breath is easily affected in difficult situations. When an experience is unpleasant, we may restrict our breathing to avoid feeling it. We may become reactive to a person because we fear experiencing difficult truths about ourselves.

In some cases, we might start a conflict because there is some truth about ourselves that the ego doesn’t want to experience and we project that quality onto the other person. We may even escalate a conflict because of resentment of our current experience with the person. We are much more vulnerable to the negativity coming from others.

With mindfulness, the breath is deep and free. During unpleasant situations, it remains unaffected. We are not burying any unpleasant information about ourselves. We are simply noting what is going on while still participating with what is going on. There is nothing to resent. Everything is just a set of processes happening in the moment, and we are joyfully embracing them whether we’re angry, sad or scared.

Most of the tension in our bodies comes from being unwilling to confront and experience something. There may be old wounds or feelings that the ego feels are best left untouched. Tension allows us to avoid experience.

Mindfulness allows us to open to experience and to shine the light of awareness on unresolved issues. A tension point in the body-mind is like a wall that creates separation instead of flow. Mindfulness breaks down these walls so that consciousness can start flowing. The less walls obstruct the flow, the more whole we become. There is less division in the body-mind.

Have you ever had a series of people treating you in a negative way? One of them leaves your life, and then another one pops up and treats you in the same way?

If this situation is in the past and no one’s bothering you in that way anymore, then maybe you notice that there was some tension you were holding then that doesn’t seem to exist now. There was some part of yourself that you finally “faced”, even if it was in gradual increments.

It may have taken years for you to get to that point where you finally cleared the issues that people and situations were exploiting. Mindfulness accelerates this process. It allows you to really heal yourself on a deep level and “kick some ass” at the same time.

Every interaction is an opportunity for healing.

In both peaceful and uncomfortable situations, when we heal long held tension and release it, we are actually helping the others to release their corresponding tension. In a tense situation, it is this that is going to bring a serious butt whoopin’ to the opponent while healing both ourselves and the opponent at the same time.

All of this works via subtle processes. There are very subtle processes that brought the two “opponents” (for lack of a better term) together in the first place.

There are always body sensations that come up when we’re dealing with people. Some are very pleasant, some are not very pleasant and some just plain spook us out.

One key to applying mindfulness is to embrace the experience that is happening inside us. This will provide clues about the subtle connection that is bonding us together at the moment and the tension we are holding.

Suppose your recurring problem is people talking over you all the time. Every time someone talks over you while you are attempting to speak, certain feelings come up.

By applying mindfulness, you are more acutely aware of the tension that you’ve been holding—the tension that leads to these experiences in the first place. These sensations are clues that point to what needs to be embraced and willfully experienced to break the cycle.

If you fear public speaking, feelings also come up when you walk up to the podium. You may be immobilized by the inability to embrace the experience fully.

There have been many cases when someone finally faced the experience and had a huge breakthrough. Not only did they become much more comfortable and loose onstage, but they released a whole lot of old tension that won’t stand in their way ever again. They felt much lighter after the breakthrough. This is the kind of thing we’re aiming for.

Paying attention to body sensations is an essential step to breaking negative recurring cycles. In the above examples, there is the experience the ego is resisting, and the resistance is always a form of tension. Let go of the tension, and the recurring unpleasant experience will disappear.

If the unpleasant situation is triggered by other people, then either those people will disappear or their underlying issues that lead to our pain will disappear. Whatever the case, we will not keep experiencing it if we let go of that tension, whether gradually or all at once.

The more you practice meditation, the greater your ability to transform all types of conflict into healing opportunities in any given moment. Your access to a spacious and all-embracing consciousness will become easier in each situation as time goes on.

“First take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.”

~ Matthew 7:5 English Standard Version

Jesus wasn’t saying that if you get rid of your own blemish, then you have a right to judge your brother. When you release your own tension, you’ll catalyze great healing in the other person and perhaps even force it without trying. After that, you may run into someone else who has the same problem. Instead of running into more problems, you are now in the position to help them overcome theirs.

 


Regular cultivation of mindfulness is the key to clearing the log and the speck.

If you’ve been spending time cultivating mindfulness, try putting some of these principles into practice. You may deepen your understanding of the link between meditation and martial arts.

Open up a can of whoop-ass and champion the cause of peace."

Please watch here for a short video clip

Now please read "Starwars, FACT not fiction"
http://jahtruth.net/starwar.htm

Please read The Way home or face The Fire http://thewayhomeorfacethefire.net

Your Daily Jesus Discipline http://jahtruth.net/yodas.htm